Have you encountered manifestations of manipulation? How does a manipulator usually act on their victim? You can be confused in a conversation with different arguments or they can change topics of conversation. A manipulator often pre-chooses ways to influence his victim:
— Using suggestions. At the same time, the words are often heard: you must, you must, you must (the arsenal of many leaders).
— They try to use the contamination of the idea through emotions. «It’s just fantastic!», «Unimaginable!», «Just imagine how great it will be!» (of course it will be great, but after that you will work much more than usual, and perhaps even without additional payment).
— And of course conviction. The manipulator will try all available arguments, but here’s the problem — only in favour of them.
If you think that «having fallen for the bait of the manipulator» you will not be able to escape, relax – it’s still possible.
Therefore, when you have a feeling that something is going wrong, then simply:
Pause your conversation. Try to understand that you have started to become the victim of manipulation. And a few seconds will be enough for you to get ready and …
To paraphrase the intentions of your manipulator: «So you mean that you need me to go out to work on my day off for no extra money?»
Understand why a person can put forward these conditions to you? Personal boundaries / responsibilities may have been misplaced initially.
Or you can even ask again: «What do you mean?»
What about compliments?
But a natural question arises. What about compliments? After all, this can also be a kind of manipulation? Perhaps — yes. But compliments can vary. Some are justified but we understand when they are. And compliments from the category: «You are so beautiful, smart ……. help me do this», «well, you are a professional, you are so experienced …. you know.» Here in your head the question should arise: «What, in fact, are you doing here if I’m a professional and you’re not.»
Why are people so comfortable with manipulation? Everything is simple here. The ability to manipulate people makes it easy to achieve a goal since many people like it without straining to achieve results. So why don’t people use such simple defensive methods? Well, because the habit or skill of defending a boundary requires personal effort and training. Don’t get caught in the manipulator’s net!